Merry Christmas

Its Christmas eve here in Kottayam and the Cherickel family is assembled to celebrate the religious event as well as toast to the little man's arrival. The little man meanwhile has seen his fare share of airplanes & airport and seems to be taking to his new roadwarrior role quite naturally. The Kerala weather seemed to be a challenge initially but he seems to have adapted quite well. Our dude is getting ready to becoming a christian, more after the baptism. MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

My new life

My new life or perhaps more appropriately put, the lack of one. And its not because of my newly minted status of becoming a father. Work has taken on a new life form of its own, hard to explain as there is plenty of work for which one should be grateful for given the current economic state of things however things just don't seem to settle down. I was hoping to enjoy a little bit of the summer with visiting family and get to know my little boy but so far all I am getting used red eye flights on KLM. Queen bee has adjusted to her new fulltime occupation quite deftly though still limited mobility however things have significantly improved since D day. Boy wonder, who is also a firm third point in our family triangle, is really beginning to fill out. I think its all the good german milk and perhaps my exhaustive cooking! I was hoping to make more notes on this blog about his development but unfortunately I procrastinate better than I write. More in his 100 day report.

My son

And he is finally here. He is no more a bump in P's anatomy, a dream that I once dreamt, a blessing that I yearned to be blessed with but my very own son. I am very smug about this, its a fact that no one that can take away from me and one I am exceptionally proud about. I don't admit to the fact that this has changed my life completely however I have noticed that my priorities have changed. I suspect the life changing moments will come. I had already decided well before I thought about becoming a father that I would like to bear witness to my children being born. That experience was perhaps life changing. Its hard to express in words what I went through however I remember that it was very clear and the whole process was very decisive but it also felt like waiting for long distance Indian train to arrive. Spiritual is another word that I am tempted to use except that this was very real. Perhaps it was poignant reminder of where I started. My first thoughts at seeing my son were also peculiar. The delivery room felt strangely transformed into a Stanley Kubrik movie setting and my son being the center of attraction. I remember the light was dim, it was cloudy outside and my son looked strangely alien. A face I could not recognize, a long head , curls that shone, bluish green skin and eyes that you could die for. However the most enigmatic part, he was quiet. Not a peep from him. It was as if he was not afraid and we were all teriffied. Till we touched him. This I had not expected. I thought my son would come out loud and boisterous. And yes one more detail struck me however I did not understand the context till a few days later. His name had to be Jai.

Almost there..

But sometimes it feels more like "Are we there yet"... We were dubiously close to being branded lazy parents till finally threats of violence from my better half persuaded me to run down our baby todo list. I think we finally have all that will make the little one comfortable whenever he decides to show up. I was in India a few months ago when I did my first bit of baby shopping and I must admit it was a bit strange buying napkin-sized clothes for someone that you have not known but will clearly be your responsibility. Fair to admit, it has not hit home yet. Support troops (or should I say advance attack troops) have arrived, MIL has OKed preparations. I am currently on a travel ban so enjoying the rather frigid summer days here in Munich.

What to expect when your better half is expecting!!

Pregnancy is the inescapable path to parenthood. Perhaps in older and less worldier times it was easy to escape the bulge that bewitched you every time you looked at it though nowadays I suspect its hard to escape the bulge's gaze. I am willing to go on record and state that it is actually quite enjoyable even for the less burdened partner. I wonder if it will be the same when we have out 7th kid! Nature as we all know plays an important part in the evolution of us human being and more importantly in teaching us how to cope with change. One interesting theory that a friend told us when she was having her baby was that for the first couple of months the baby tends to look like the father more than the mother. Nature's way of reassuring the father that the baby is his lest he harm's it. Clever! Another interesting one, the Japanese believe that the sex of the baby is often such that it provides support to the dominated partner in the relationship. I.e. if the husband is henpecked, then more than likely the sex will be a male or if the male is more dominating then it will be a girl. Guess what the sex of our baby is !!

Letter from a prospective Father - in - Law

One of the stigmas of being brown skinned and from the subcontinent is often the association with arranged marriages. It is usually an enlivening dinner topic though having gone through several such discussions in my ripe 20's I had come to the conclusion that my youthful eagerness about my worldly marriage views were myopic at best. In perhaps a classic jaundiced view about how my brethren view this, I just assumed that teary Indian movies were actually elevating the awareness in what is sometimes a difficult process to get married. I assumed people were much smarter and got the message that while it is cool to be get an arranged one done, one needs to be tactful about it. That was till I read the email below. Below are some excerpts from an email that a prospective father in law (senior scientist of some sort) wrote to a very close relative who is a prospective bride. Names have been changed but everything else is verbatim. ----------------------------------------------------------------XXX----------------------------------------- Dear Sir / Madam , It has indeed been nice talking to you at some length . The abundant blessings seen on your family are a sequel to your hard work and good christian living . 2) As a summation of my previous emails and pursuant to some points figured in our telecon today, I ask myself and answer below some hypothetical questions (imagined general points). i) Is Dr Sanjeev Fair: Certainly Yes. Sanjeev is 5ft 8in . On a scale in which a black man is given 1 point and a European 10 points for colour , Dr Sanjeev gets 8.5+ points . If Shah Rukh Khan or Mohan Lal is given 10 points for their handsomeness, Dr Sanjeev also gets the same 10 points if not more. ii) Do we demand money: Certainly not ( However , what a bride may get as a customary practice is a blessing and is OK ) iii) Do we ask for Jewels: Again NO. But what a bride gets as a custom is OK. iv) Do we insist on marriage to be conducted in Bangalore: No, mutual wish , convenience and tradition. v) Has Dr Sanjeev been married earlier: Certainly NOT ( this is a ridiculous and idiotic question to ask myself and answer, but it is best done) vi) Has he been engaged earlier: Certainly NOT vii) Why is he interested in marrying only an Indian origin girl : He does not believe in American girls and American values. He thinks that American girls would want only his money, and latter in life, some day 10,20,30 years hence , a white wife could cause serious problems to him and his children . ix) If every thing is no, What does Sanjay actually want : He wants only three things a) a very beautiful girl b) a fair girl and c) good christian upbringing [The girl should not have been married earlier ; Should not have been engaged to some one earlier; and should not have been in love with some one else earlier]. These 3 things are also very true of him as well point - to - point. 2) You may think why I raise irrelevant questions and answer them myself . Such questions were very much in my mind , when Dr Johnny came in 1996 from US to marry my eldest daughter Dr Sheila. They were on her mind also. It is now 11 years and they are just fine in Dallas and get on very well . They are typically Indian and live around their son . In fact all my five brothers families are very normal and exemplary and all children came up well , but Dr Sanjeev is the most brilliant and most prosperous person among all his cousins. 3) Denomination : We are CSI . But in my conviction all denominations are equal in the sight of God . But should you have some point we could sort that out very amicably should it be a stumbling block . If you have any other questions, please send an email and I will be glad to send a reply. ----------------------------------------------------------The End------------------------------------

Half my kingdom for a decent name

Thats right, inspite of thousands of books we have read, countless movies we have seen and now several pages of a newly acquired baby book- we are still stumped for a name! The boundary conditions of the search are innoucous when considered by each cherickel seperatley however when consulted together big red X`s are all we are able to agree on. We have few more weeks depending on whether the baby decides to overacheive or follow father's footsteps and be late for everything!